Print

[CigarBanter]

Find any cigar deals on the various internet sites? Any worth talking about? Join in this hump day discussion and perhaps learn something along the way.  Warning: don't proceed if you have thin skin but don't be afraid to post either...  And welcome aboard!

[LSUFAN]

Good morning guys.

[LSUFAN]

4 Romeo y Julieta Vintage #7.5 (Toro) (6.2"x54)
         10/39.99
 3 Nica Libre Silver 25th Anniversary Torpedo (6.0"x56)
          5/24.50
 2 Drew Estate Tabak Especial Limited
         10/39.99
 1 Cohiba Puro Dominicana
         5/29.99

[LSUFAN]

On this day in history ..
0535 - St Agapitus I begins his reign as Catholic Pope
0609 - Pope Boniface I turns Pantheon into Catholic church
0641 - Eligius (Saint Eloy) becomes bishop of Doornik-Noyon
1106 - Henry I of Limburg becomes duke of Neth-Lutherans
1110 - Crusaders march into Beirut causing a bloodbath
1364 - Peter Coutherel banished from Leuven
1497 - Pope Alexander VI excommunicates Girolamo Savonarola
1559 - Excavated corpse of heretic David Jorisz burned in Basel
1568 - Mary Queen of Scots is defeated by English at battle of Langside
1588 - King Henri III flees Paris
1607 - English colonists (John Smith) lands near James River in VA
1624 - Admiral Hermites fleet blockade Lima Peru
1637 - Cardinal Richelieu of France creates the table knife
1643 - Battle at Grantham: English parliamentary armies beat royalists
1643 - Heavy earthquake strikes Santiago Chile; kills 1/3 of population
1652 - Ingen Ryuki invited to become the abbot of Sofokuji temple in Nagasaki
1654 - Venetian fleet under Adm Adeler beats Turkish
1767 - Mozart's opera "Apollo et Hyacinthus," premieres in Salzburg
1777 - University library at Vienna opens
1779 - War of Bavarian Succession ends
1787 - Arthur Phillip sets sails with 11 ships of criminals to Botany Bay
1820 - Opera "Die J„garsbraut" is completed
1828 - US passes Tariff of Abominations
1830 - Republic of Ecuador is founded, with Juan Jose Flores as president
1835 - 1st foreign embassy in Hawaii forms
1846 - US declares war on M‚xico, 2 months after fighting begins
1861 - Queen Victoria announces England's position of neutrality
1864 - -16] Atlanta Campaign-Battle of Resaca Georgia
1865 - S Brownsville, TX (Palmito Ranch) Final engagement of Civil War PVT John J Williams of 34th Indiana is last man killed
1874 - Pope Pius IX encyclical "On Greek-Ruthenian rite"
1876 - Amersfoort-Zutphen railway opens
1877 - C‚sar Franck's "Lesson Eolides," premieres
1882 - Toba-indians killed 20 members of French expedition
1884 - Institute for Electrical & Electronics Engineers (IEEE) forms
1887 - 15th Preakness: William Donohue aboard Dunboyne wins in 2:39«
1888 - DeWolf Hooper 1st recited "Casey at Bat"
1888 - Princess Isabel of Brazil signs "Lei Aur‚a" abolishing slavery
1890 - 18th Preakness: W Martin aboard Montague wins in 2:36.75
1890 - Lord Salisbury offers Germany Helgoland in exchange for Zanzibar, Uganda & Equatoria
1891 - 17th Kentucky Derby: Isaac Murphy aboard Kingman wins in 2:52¬

[LSUFAN]

1905 - James J Jeffries retires as boxing champ
1906 - Bezalel Art School opens in Jerusalem
1909 - Christian National Labor Workers (CNV) party begins in Netherlands
1911 - 37th Kentucky Derby: George Archibald aboard Meridian wins in 2:05
1911 - NY Giant Fred Merkle is 1st to get 6 RBIs in an inning (1st)
1912 - Royal Flying Corps forms in England
1913 - 1st 4 engine aircraft built & flown (Igor Sikorsky-Russia)
1916 - 1st observance of Indian (Native American) Day
1916 - 42nd Kentucky Derby: Johnny Loftus aboard George Smith wins in 2:04
1916 - Native American Day is 1st observed
1917 - 1st appearance of Mary to 3 shepherd children in Fatima, Portugal
1917 - Ernest Bloch's "Schelomo," premieres
1918 - 1st US airmail stamps issued (24›)
1922 - 48th Kentucky Derby: Albert Johnson aboard Morvich wins in 2:04.6
1922 - 48th Preakness: L Morris aboard Pillory wins in 1:51.6
1923 - Pulitzer prize awarded to Willa Carter (One of Ours)
1926 - German govt of Luther falls
1927 - "Black Friday" on Berlin Stock Exchange
1927 - VVOG soccer team forms in Harderwijk
1930 - Farmer killed by hail in Lubbock, Texas
1930 - Only known fatality due to hail
1931 - Paul Doumer elected president of France
1932 - Russian composer Dmitri Sjostakovitch marries Nina Varsar
1933 - 59th Preakness: Charley Kurtsinger aboard Head Play wins in 2:02
1934 - Great dustbowl storm
1936 - Quiroga govt takes office in Spain
1939 - 65th Preakness: George Seabo aboard Challedon wins in 1:59.8
1939 - SS St Louis departs Hamburg with 937 Jews fugitives
1940 - British bomb factory at Breda
1940 - Churchill says I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears & sweat
1940 - Dutch Queen Wilhelmina flees to England
1940 - German breakthrough at Grebbelinie
1941 - Martin Bormann is named head of Nazi Party Chancellery in Germany
1941 - Trial against resistance fighter comte d'Estienne d'Orves begins
1941 - Willy Lewis' US jazz band performs in Switzerland
1942 - Helicopter makes its 1st cross-country flight
1942 - Pitcher Jim Tobin belts 3 HRs in a game
1943 - German & Italian forces in Africa surrender
1943 - German occupiers confiscate all radios
1944 - 70th Preakness: Conn McCreary aboard Pensive wins in 1:59.2
1945 - US troops conquer Dakeshi Okinawa
1946 - Sarwate & Banerjee add 249 for 10th wkt for Indians v Surrey
1946 - US convicts 58 camp guard of Mauthausen concentration camp to death
1946 - Winston Churchill welcomed in Rotterdam

[LSUFAN]

1947 - Senate approved the Taft-Hartley Act limiting the power of unions
1949 - 1st British-produced jet bomber, Canberra, makes its 1st test flight
1950 - Diner's Club issues its 1st credit cards
1952 - Minor-league Bristol pitcher Ron Necciai strikes out 27 in 9-innings
1952 - Pandit Nehru becomes premier of India
1953 - NY Giants Willie Mays & Darryl Spencer each hit 2 HRs & a triple
1954 - "Pajama Game" opens at St James Theater NYC for 1063 performances
1954 - Labour Party wins British municipal elections
1954 - Robin Roberts gives up a HR then retires next 27 men in a row
1954 - US performs atmospheric nuclear test at Enwetak
1955 - Mickey Mantle hits 3 consecutive HRs of at least 463'
1956 - Pachyderm Building at Cleveland Metroparks Zoo opens
1958 - French settlers riot against French army in Algeria
1958 - Jordan & Iraq form Arab Federation
1958 - Pierre Pflimlin forms French govt
1958 - Rioters attack US VP Nixon in Venezuela
1958 - Stan Musial, is 8th to get 3,000 hits
1959 - Kraft Music Hall with Milton Berle, last airs on NBC-TV
1960 - 1st launch of Delta satellite launching vehicle; it failed
1960 - Phillies lose 3rd consecutive 1-0 game
1960 - WOLE TV channel 12 in Aguadillo, PR
1962 - Mickey Wright wins LPGA Western Golf Open
1965 - Rolling Stones record "Satisfaction"
1965 - Several Arab nations break ties with West Germany after it established diplomatic relations with Israel
1966 - Rolling Stones release "Paint it Black"
1966 - Federal education funding is denied to 12 school districts in the South because of violations of the 1964 Civil Rights Act
1967 - NY Yankee Mickey Mantle hits career HR #500 off Stu Miller
1967 - Octagonal boxing ring is tested to avoid corner injuries
1968 - 1,000,000 French demonstrate against De Gaulle & Pompidou
1970 - Beatles movie "Let it Be" premieres
1971 - Grace Slick of Jefferson Airplane seriously injured in a car accident
1972 - 115 die in nightclub atop 7-story Sennichi dept store (Osaka Japan)
1972 - Milwaukee Brewers beat Minn Twins, 4-3, in 22 innings (started 5/12)
1973 - "Cyrano" opens at Palace Theater NYC for 49 performances
1973 - Bobby Riggs beat Margaret Smith Court in Mother's Day match in Calif
1973 - Judy Rankin wins LPGA Lady Carling Golf Open
1975 - "Rodgers & Hart" opens at Helen Hayes Theater NYC for 108 performances
1975 - Flyers 4-Isles 1-Semifinals-Flyers win semifinals 4-3

[LSUFAN]

1975 - Hail stones as large as tennis balls hit Wernerville Tenn
1976 - 9th & final ABA championship: NY Nets beat Denv Nuggets, 4 games to 2
1977 - Howard Stern begins broadcasting at WRNW, Briarcliff Manor NY
1978 - "Angel" closes at Minskoff Theater NYC after 5 performances
1978 - "Runaways" opens at Plymouth Theater NYC for 199 performances
1978 - Henry Rono of Kenya sets record for 3,000 m steeplechase (8:05.4)
1978 - Joie Chitwood drives a Chevette 5.6 miles on just 2 wheels
1978 - Musical "Runaways" with Elizabeth Swados premieres in NYC
1979 - "Utter Glory... Morrissey Hall" opens & closes at Mark Hellinger NYC
1979 - Sandra Post wins LPGA Lady Michelob Golf Tournament
1979 - Shah & family sentenced to death in Teheran
1980 - Cincinnati Red Ray Knight hits 2 HRs in 5th inning vs NY Mets
1981 - Dinamo Tbilisi wins 21st Europe Cup II
1981 - Pope John Paul II shot, wounded by assailant in St Peter's Square
1982 - Braniff Airlines files for bankruptcy
1982 - Canucks 0-Isles 3-Stanley Cup-Isles hold 3-0 lead
1982 - Chicago Cubs win their 8,000th (beat Astros)
1982 - Soyuz T-5 is launched-Berezovoi & Lebedev for 211 days in space
1982 - Terri Lea Utley, 20, (Arkansas), crowned 31st Miss USA
1983 - Reggie Jackson is 1st major leaguer to strike out 2,000 times
1984 - "Oliver!" closes at Mark Hellinger Theater NYC after 17 performances
1984 - Amy Alcott wins LPGA United Virginia Bank Golf Classic
1984 - Johan Cruyffs last competitive match
1985 - Carlton Fisk becomes 5th catcher to steal 100 bases
1985 - Laura Elena Martinez-Herring, 21, (Texas), crowned 34th Miss USA
1985 - Phila Police bomb a house held by group "Move," kills 11
1987 - Ajax wins 27th Europe Cup II
1989 - Approx 2,000 students begin hunger strike in Tiananmen Square, China
1989 - Minn Twin Kirby Puckett becomes 35th to hit 4 doubles in a game
1989 - Trinidad & Tobago ties US 1-1, in 3rd round of 1990 world soccer cup
1990 - "Change in the Heir" closes at Edison Theater NYC after 16 perfs
1990 - Dottie Mochrie wins LPGA Crestar Golf Classic
1991 - "Michael Jackson: Magic & Madness" goes on sale
1991 - Apple releases Macintosh System 7.0
1991 - South African activist Winnie Mandela convicted of abducting 4 blacks
1991 - Yankee Stadium fans sing "Like a Virgin" to Jose Canseco
1992 - 3 astronauts simultaneous walked in space for the 1st time
1992 - Ajax wins 21st UEFA Cup
1992 - Concrete foundation for ballpark at Gateway (Jacobs Field) is poured
1992 - Final episode of "Night Court" airs on NBC-TV
1992 - Frank Stallone beats Geraldo Rivera in boxing on Howard Stern Show
1993 - 6th annual business person run held in Wall Street
1993 - Arsenio Hall's 1,000th show retrospective seen in Netherlands
1993 - CBS' Knots Landing ends 14 year run with 334th show in Netherlands
1993 - KC Royal George Brett hits his 300th HR
1993 - Methane gas explosion in Secunda coal mine South-Africa, kills 50
1994 - Indians, begin a 18 home game hoome win streak at Jacobs Field
1995 - 6.5 earthquake hits Greece
1995 - New Zealand beats US for the America's Cup
1995 - Chelsi Smith, 21, of USA, crowned 44th Miss Universe Shanna Lynn Moakler, (19-NY), replaces Chelsi Smith as Miss USA
1996 - OJ Simpson appears on British TV discussing his not guilty verdict
1997 - Eddie Murray is 6th baseball player to play in 3,000 games

[LSUFAN]

Famous birthdays for this day ..

1314 - Sergius of Radonesh, Russian saint
1592 - John Cloppenburg, vicar/theologist
1655 - Innocent XIII, [Michelangiolo dei Conti], Italy, 244th Pope (1721-24)
1717 - Maria Theresa, Empress of Austria (Wife of emperor Franz I)
1729 - Henry William (Baron) Stiegel, early American glassmaker
1730 - Charles Watson-Wentworth 2nd marquis of Rockingham, Engl PM (1765-76)
1730 - Marquess of Rockingham, (Whig), British PM (1765-66, 1782)
1735 - Horace Coignet, composer
1746 - Oliver Brownson, composer
1756 - Wojciech Zywny, composer
1761 - Adrian Loosjes Pzn, publisher/writer (Mauritius Lijnslager)
1769 - Joƒo VI M L J, King of Portugal (1816-26)
1776 - Charles Ots, composer
1776 - Rodrigo Ferreira da Costa, composer
1792 - Pius IX "Pio Nono", [Giovanni-Maria Mastai-Ferretti], Pope (1846-78)
1795 - Joshua Ratoon Sands, Commander (Union Navy), died in 1883
1828 - Josephine Elizabeth Butler, social reformer
1830 - Zebulon Baird Vance, Governor (Confederacy), died in 1894
1831 - Willem baron of Goltstein of Oldenaller, Dutch minister of Colonies
1840 - Alphonse Daudet, writer
1840 - L-M Alphonse Daudet, French writer (Tartarin of Tarascon)
1842 - Arthur Seymour Sullivan, London England, composer (Gilbert & Sullivan)
1843 - Count Paul J Smet de Naeyer, Belgian politician
1847 - Johannes Haarklou, composer
1854 - Louis H Chrispijn, Dutch director (Lost & Found, Silvia Silombra)
1854 - Paul Klengel, composer
1856 - Peter Henry Emerson, 1st to promote photography as an independent art
1857 - Ronald Ross, England, pathologist (Nobel 1902)
1859 - Eugust Enna, composer
1866 - Ottokar Eugen Novacek, composer
1867 - Frank Brangwyn, Wales, painter/muralist/cartoonist (Willam Morris)
1868 - Paolo Gallico, composer
1874 - Henry Clough-Leiter, composer
1876 - Raoul Laparra, composer
1881 - Ilona Durigo, Hungarian singer
1882 - Georges F Broque, French cubist painter (Bike)
1883 - Henk JFM Sneevliet, leader RSAP/editor Spartacus (Dutch-Indies)
1886 - Joseph Achron, Latvia/US violinist/composer (Golem suite)
1891 - Fritz Rasp, Bayreuth Germany, actor (Diary of a Lost Girl)
1896 - Charles F Pahud de Mortanges, Dutch equestrian (Olympic-gold-1928, 32)

[LSUFAN]

1900 - Jos Panhuysen, author (Pornographer)
1903 - Alfred Pugsley, civil engineer
1903 - Paul Page, Birmingham AL, actor (Girl From Havana, Moth)
1904 - Alfred Earle Birney, poet
1904 - Tim Wall, cricketer (18 Tests for Australia 1928-34)
1906 - Thomas Mitchell, architect/engineer
1907 - Austin Whitaker, schoolmaster classical scholar/archivist
1907 - Daphne du Maurier, English writer (Rebecca, Parasites)
1907 - Laurence Kirwan, archaeologist
1908 - Michael Richardson, commandant (Home for Disabled Sailors)
1911 - Maxine Sullivan, [Marietta Williams], US singer/actress (Going Places)
1911 - Robert Middleman, Cin Oh, actor (Barney-Monroes)
1912 - Helen Craig, San Antonio TX, actress (Snake Pit, They Live by Night)
1913 - Sanjiva Reddy, president (India)
1913 - William R Tolbert, president Liberia (1971-80)
1914 - Joe Louis, world heavyweight boxing champion (1937-49)
1915 - John Habakkuk, principal (Jesus College in Oxford)
1917 - Paul Osmond, British senior civil servant
1917 - Wilhelmus C Wijen, [Broeder Pius], social worker (Cura‡ao)
1918 - John Johnston, British diplomat (Rhodesia, Malaysia)
1920 - Ratu Kasmisere Mara, PM of Fiji (1960-70, 70- )/pres (1994- )
1921 - Syd[ney G] Vincent, British mine workers leader
1926 - Beatrice Arthur, [Frankel], NY, actress (Maude, Dorothy-Golden Girls)
1927 - Clive Barnes, drama critic (NY Times, NY Post)
1927 - Herbert Ross, director/choreographer (Footloose)
1930 - Mike Gravel, (Sen-R-Alaska)
1931 - Eileen Diss, theatrical designer (August, Secret Places, Betrayal)
1931 - Jim Jones, reverend, poisoned over 100 in Guyana (Jonestown Massacre)
1931 - Sydney Lipworth, CEO (Monopolies & Mergers Commission)
1931 - William Utting, chief inspector (British Social Services)
1933 - Alden Ashforth, composer
1933 - Sid Morrison, (Rep-R-WA, 1981- )
1933 - Stig Gustav Schonberg, composer
1934 - Adolf Muschg, writer
1935 - Nigel Butterley, composer
1935 - Yizhak Sadai, composer
1936 - Alan Rayfield, governor (Long Latin Prison)
1936 - Rafael Campos, Santiago Dominican Republic, actor (Tonka)
1937 - John Cope, MP/Paymaster General
1937 - Judith Somogi, NYC, conductor (Frankfurt Opera-1982)
1937 - Roger [Joseph] Zelazny, sci-fi author (6 Hugos, Chronicles of Amber)
1937 - Zohra Lampert, NYC, actress (Doctor's Hospital)
1938 - Buck Taylor, Hollywood Calif, actor (Monroes, Gunsmoke)
1939 - Anthony Hide, racehorse trainer

[LSUFAN]

1939 - Harvey Keitel, actor (Taxi Driver, Pulp Fiction, Reservoir Dogs)
1939 - Terry Dill, Forth Worth TX, PGA golfer (1992 Bank One Senior Classic)
1939 - William W Cobey Jr, (Rep-R-NC, 1985-87)
1940 - Bruce Chatwin, England, writer (On the Black Hill)
1940 - Richard Brooks, singer (Impressions)
1941 - Imca Marina, [Bijl], singer (Viva Espa¤a, Bella Italia, Oh Brazil)
1941 - Joe Brown, singer/guitarist
1941 - Ritchie Valens, singer (Donna, La Bamba)
1941 - Senta Berger, Vienna Austria, actress (Cast a Giant Shadow)
1942 - Jim Douglas, jazz guitarist
1942 - Vladimir A Dzhanibekov, USSR, cosmo (Soyuz 27, 39, T-6, T-12, T-13)
1943 - Mary Wells, Detroit, singer (My Guy)
1944 - Betsy Finley Ashton, broadcast journalist/author/lecturer
1944 - Carolyn Franklin, US singer/songwriter (Baby Baby Baby, Angel)
1944 - Clive Radley, cricketer (England batsman in 8 Tests 1978)
1944 - Crispin Agnew of Lochnaw, British explorer/genealogist
1945 - Magic Dick, [Richard Salwitz], harmonicaist (J Geils Band-Centerfold)
1946 - Danny Klein, NYC, rock bassist (J Geils Band-Centerfold)
1946 - Tim Pigott-Smith, actor (Sweet William, Jewel in Crown)
1947 - David Hughes, cricketer
1947 - Pete "Overend" Watts, rock bassist (Mott The Hoople-All Young Dudes)
1947 - Stephen R Donaldson, US, sci-fi author (Lord Foul's Bane)
1949 - Franklin Ajaye, BKln NY, comedian/actor (Jazz Singer, Car Wash)
1949 - John Glover, conductor
1949 - Overend Watts, rock bassist (Mott the Hoople-All the Young Dudes)
1949 - Zoe Wanamaker, actress (Raggedy Rawney)
1950 - Danny Kirwan, rocker (Fleetwood Mac)
1950 - John "Jocko" Marcellino, rocker/actor (Tagget, Hot to Trot, Rain Man)
1950 - Peter Gabriel, rocker (Genesis-Against All Odds)
1950 - Stevie Wonder, singer/songwriter (You are the Sunshine of My Love)
1951 - Paul Thompson, rock drummer (Roxy Music)
1951 - Selina Scott, TV newscaster (West 57th)
1952 - John R Kasich, (Rep-R-OH, 1983- )
1952 - Manfred Langer, Austrian/Dutch disco builder
1952 - Sew Shivnarine, cricketer (3 Tests for WI 1978, later USA captain)
1956 - Aleksandr Yuriyevich Kaleri, Russia, cosmonaut (Soyuz TM-14)
1956 - Darius Rucker, lead vocalist (Hootie & the Blowfish-Let Her Cry)
1957 - Claudie Andr‚-Deshays, France, cosmonaut (Soyuz TM-24)
1957 - Eloise Broady, Houston Tx, playmate (Apr, 1988)
1958 - Frances Barber, Wolverhampton England, actress (Castaway)
1959 - Robert Earnshaw, racehorse trainer
1960 - Richard M "Dick" van de Toorn, actor (Pastorale)
1960 - Shannon Vessup-Millen, LA Calif, WPVA volleyballer (National-9th-1991)
1961 - Dennis Rodman, NBA forward (Chicago Bulls)
1963 - Julian Brookhouse, rocker (Curiosity Killed Cat-Keep Your Distance)
1963 - Wally Masur, England, tennis star
1964 - Sam Randolph, Santa Barbara CA, Nike golfer (1993 New England-2nd)
1964 - Sara Gomer, England, tennis star
1965 - Chris Washburn, NBAer

[LSUFAN]

1968 - Annette DeLuca, North Bergen NJ, LPGA golfer
1968 - James Harris, NFL defensive end (Minn Vikings)
1969 - Lyle Mouton, Lafayette Louisiana, outfielder (Chic White Sox)
1970 - Doug Evans, NFL defensive back (Green Bay Packers-Superbowl 31)
1970 - Giuseppe Busillo, hockey forward (Team Italy 1998)
1970 - Mark Beaufait, Royal Oak Mich, US hockey forward (Olympics-1994)
1970 - Mitch Lyons, NFL tight end (Atlanta Falcons, Pittsburgh Steelers)
1970 - Selwyn Jones, NFL defensive back (Seahawks, Den Broncos-Superbowl 32)
1971 - Hamish Pepper, Auckland NZ, laser single handed yachter (Olympics-96)
1971 - Michael Sirotka, Chicago IL, pitcher (Chic White Sox)
1971 - Rob Fredrickson, NFL linebacker (Oakland Raiders)
1971 - Tom Nalen, NFL center (Denver Broncos-Superbowl 32)
1972 - Darryl Sydor, Edmonton, NHL defenseman (Dallas Stars)
1972 - Josh Heinrich, NFL/WLAF defensive end (Lions, Barcelona Dragons)
1973 - Brooke Jennifer Gambrell, Boise Idaho, Miss America-Idaho (1996)
1973 - Michelle Mouser, Miss USA-Ohio (1997)
1974 - Albert Connell, wide receiver (Washington Redskins)
1974 - Lisa Jacob, 800m freestyle relay (Olympics-96)
1975 - Chris Crawford, NBA forward (Atlanta Hawks)
1977 - Diane Halber, Torrance Calif, fig skater (1996 Natl Collegiate champ)
1977 - Sara DeCosta, ice hockey goalie (USA, Oly-98)

[LSUFAN]

Two Wishes
-------------------------

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him.

As he sits, the waitress comes over and asks for their orders.

The man says, "I'll have a hamburger, fries and a coke," and turns to the
ostrich, "What's yours?"

"I'll have the same," says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress returns with the order. "That will be $6.40
please," and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change
for payment.

The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, "I'll
have a hamburger, fries and a coke," and the ostrich says, "I'll have the
same."

Once again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.

This becomes a routine until late one evening, the two enter again.

"The usual?" asks the waitress. "No, this is Friday night, so I will have a
steak, baked potato and salad," says the man, "same for me," says the
ostrich.

A short time later the waitress comes with the order and says, "That will be
$12.62."Once again the man pulls exact change out of his pocket and places
it on the table.

The waitress can't hold back her curiosity any longer.

"Excuse me, sir.How do you manage to always come up with the exact change
out of your pocket every time?"

"Well," says the man, "several years ago I was cleaning the attic and I
found an old lamp. When I rubbed it a Genie appeared and offered me two
wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would
just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be
there."

"That's brilliant!"says the waitress. "Most people would wish for a million
dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long
as you live!"

"That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact
money is always there," says the man.

The waitress asks, "One other thing, sir, what's with the ostrich?"

The man sighs, pauses, and answers, "My second wish was for a tall chick
with long legs who agrees with everything I say."

[LSUFAN]

Time Off
-------------------------

Two factory workers were talking.  "I know how to get some time off from
work." said the man.

"How do you think you will do that?" said the other one.  He proceeded to
show her...by climbing up to the rafters, and hanging upside down.

The boss walked in, saw the worker hanging from the ceiling, and asked him
what on earth he was doing?  "I'm a light bulb" answered the guy.

"I think you need some time off," said the boss.  So, the man jumped down
and walked out of the factory.  The second worker began walking out too.
The boss asked her where did she think she was going?

"Home.  I can't work in the dark."

[LSUFAN]

90-Year Old Man
-------------------------

A 90-year old man said to his doctor, "I've never felt better... I have an 18-year old bride who is pregnant with my child. What do you think of that?"

The doctor replied, "I have an elderly friend who is a hunter and never misses a season. One day he was in a hurry and picked up his umbrella instead of his gun by mistake. When he got to the creek, he saw a beaver. He raised his umbrella and went "bang, bang, bang", and the beaver fell dead. What do you think of that?"

The 90-year old said, "I'd say somebody else shot the beaver."

The doctor said, "My point exactly".

[LSUFAN]

Time to hit the road for work, enjoy your day guys.